Sunday, January 01, 2006

Confusion

Confusion is something that I wanted to leave behind in the year formerly known as 2005. Unfortunately, on today, the first day of 2006, I have allowed confusion to accompany me into the new year.

I would like to sit here and work out the exact nature of my confusion, but my emotions are all over the place. With that said, I will change the subject and announce to anyone reading that I am going to start another blog that is dedicated solely to my pursuit of marathon racing and living a healthy life (physically anyway).

Kim

Monday, December 26, 2005

As the year closes..

my thoughts turn reflective. Identifying things in the past year that I have done and that I am pleased about as well as those things that I wish I could get the proverbial "do over" for.

I think in this year I have made some really good friends and a lot of acquaintances. At the end of the year I feel like I made an awesome career move. Things that I wish I could do over is spend more time with my family and my college friends who are like my family. I also wish that I had remained more dedicated to my work out. This is magnified by the fact that I ate REALLY good on yesterday and I have been eating REALLY good since around Thanksgiving.

In the next couple of days, I am doing to decide what direction I will be steering my life in for the next 365 days. Hopefully my triumphs will outweigh my regrets. All and all however 2005 wasn't a really bad year.

I thank God for each day he has allowed me to grace this planet. If it is his will, I hope that I have many more and I hope that he will make my path clearer. He has definitely allowed it to be interesting.

Kim

Monday, December 19, 2005

I have gotten hooked on this website called Bloggthings. This morning I took this test; http://www.blogthings.com/whattempermentareyouquiz/ . Below are my results.

You Have a Melancholic Temperament
Introspective and reflective, you think about everything and anything.You are a soft-hearted daydreamer. You long for your ideal life.You love silence and solitude. Everyday life is usually too chaotic for you.Given enough time alone, it's easy for you to find inner peace.You tend to be spiritual, having found your own meaning of life.Wise and patient, you can help people through difficult times.At your worst, you brood and sulk. Your negative thoughts can trap you.You are reserved and withdrawn. This makes it hard to connect to others.You tend to over think small things, making decisions difficult.


While reading that is kind of difficult, it is very true about me. I guess I will spend sometime trying to figure out if that is something that I can and/or wish to change about myself. Kim

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Thoughts...

Today I woke up and I felt like my world wasn't really centered. I lay in bed and let my thoughts run rampant. While that might sound like nothing to others, it was a very big deal to me. I am one that is almost always in control, so releasing that control and allowing my thoughts to bounce all over the place was somewhat liberating.

I have often said that even though I am a serious person, I don't take myself too seriously. I have come to realize that there are things in life that I can do absolutely nothing about. For the most part I feel that I have reached that place in my life because of my belief system. There are a lot of people that say they believe in a higher power. They refuse to give this higher power a name. It is as if they are playing the odds. Acknowledging that there is a being that is all powerful, but refusing to call him God. Well I believe in God and I believe that he desires for me to acknowledge him by his name. I feel that I can claim all through in the Name of God and his Son Jesus Christ. That is after all the basis of Christianity. Accepting that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. I do that. I embrace that. I find that when I stray from that my life is not right. When I stray from that...I can justify certain things that I allow to occur in my life. When I can't allow myself to face God, then I know that I am not living Christ like and nothing goes right in my life. It is really quite sad.

That is kind of where I feel I have been lately. I want to get away from that place. It is very difficult though. I guess as this year draws close to the end, my mind is where it is supposed to be and that ultimately I will get to where God wants me to be. I will not allow others that are confused about what they believe in to hamper my path back to him. I claim my reunion with him.

Kimmie

Thursday, December 15, 2005

This morning...

I realized that I date exactly how I shop. When I shop, I identify the item that I wish to purchase prior to entering the store. Upon entering the store, I go directly to that item, then proceed to the register to pay for my purchase. I will give the store a cursory review, but for the most part, I don't spend a lot of time in their looking at other options. I am exactly the same way when it comes to dating.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

I find in life...

That I always want to believe the best in my fellow homo sapiens. Time and time again I get disappointed. I think that it is because I set my standards excessively high. There are times when I think of lowering my expectations in order to minimize the amount of disappointment I feel when I am let down. I have a hard time with that though. It is not something that has been instilled in me. So I guess I will keep on believing that there are people out there in this world are worth my trust and affection. Kimmie

Monday, December 12, 2005

Today...

I charged myself with identifying exactly what I wanted to accomplish in my immediate future and steps that I intend to take in their accomplishment. While a worthwhile goal, I feel slightly overwhelmed right now. I think it is because I have so many goals.

Sometimes I think that having goals are great, but they create an undue amount of stress if you take them seriously (which I do).I am seriously wondering if I should see a counselor that can help me work through this problem. lol. Sad right! Well I think I need some independent person to sit with me and listen to what I want to do. Sometimes you need to talk things out with a neutral party. I guess that is what I am truly aiming for.

One of my pet peeves is that person that believes that they understand exactly what you are going through and decides to give you advice. *sigh*...that constitutes an immediate eye roll from me. Oh well...my lunch break is almost over. Have a great evening should you stop over. Kimmie